How do you like them apples?

Joe Crede, welcome to the Minnesota Twins. With one swing of the bat you have been accepted into our little club. It's a pretty exclusive club and we don't just let anyone in. You have to do a few things in order to gain admittance...

1. You have to hustle...always. If you don't you won't stick around (see: Casilla, Alexi)
2. You have to be able to lay down a bunt at any time (Nick Punto, keep trying. You will get there)
3. You have to hit a bomb in a key spot (we don't hit too many so when we do hit one it's exciting)
4. You have to give a boring post-game interview to Robby Incmikoski laden with cliches ("You know we played hard and never gave up and good things happen when you do that. I have faith in my guys and hopefully we can build on this going forward." It's that easy)

That is how you become a Twin. That's how you dominate.

-Andy

Knuckleballers Cont.

So, I forgot one of my main reasons for writing the previous post about knuckleballers. I wanted to relate it to Twins pitcher R.A. Dickey.

Going off of all those wonderful reasons why the knuckleball is death disguised as a 5-5.25 ounce/9-9.25 inch circumference leather bound sphere... if MLB REALLY wanted to be fair, they would 1) put a speed limit on how fast the pitch can be thrown and 2) implement a rule where pitchers whose fastball tops 79 mph CANNOT throw a knuckleball.

And this my friends is how this post relates to R.A. Dickey. Dickey's fastball is in the mid to high 80's, he has a nasty curve, AND he throws a knuckleball damn near 80 mph!!! Is this even possible? According to R.A. Dickey it is.

I guess I'm just in awe with the pitch and any hitter that succeeds against it.

Done.

- Sam

Knuckleballers

So, I'm a firm believer in justness (as are many other people - I'm not claiming to be Gandi). I've had this talk about equality with Andy about our education system's grading policy. But who wants to talk about that? Let's talk baseball, my friends. I truly believe the game of baseball is one of the most lopsided games humankind has invented. Why would anybody in their right mind want to play a game where a superstar succeeds three times out of ten? Doesn't really make much sense in my pragmatic mind. But as put by Andy, "I dig it..." Even with pitchers automatically being favored 7.5 times out of 10, the game of baseball (in its purest form... cough*... steroids... cough*) is perfect.

So, you might be wondering how this relates to the knuckleball (knuckleballers specifically)?

The knuckleball is the most challenging pitch to hit. I have two quotes for you:

1. "If anybody knows the secret on how to hit a knuckleball, they would make a fortune, because I sure don't." (Or something on those lines.) - The Splendid Splinter

2. "There are two theories on hitting a knuckleball. Unfortunately, neither of them works." ― Charlie Lau

This leads me to the question, "Is the knuckleball a fair pitch?"

Answer: Absolutely not. And that's what makes it great. The knuckleball is the greatest pitch ever invented. My dad always said that if you can consistently throw a knuckleball for strikes, you can pitch in the Bigs until you're 80. Hasn't worked for me, but I guess there's still time... I wish I had stats on the major league batting average vs the knuckleball, but I don't. My guess is it isn't good. Knuckleball pitchers usually have a high ERA, but that's just because they might walk someone, then the next batter gets lucky and hits a bomb. Let me stress how much luck is involved in hitting a home run off a knuckleball. You have to have a few things work for you: 1) The pitcher messes up and the ball doesn't knuckle; or 2) You guess right and put the bat where the ball ends up knuckling to. Either way, the odds are automatically against you.

So, should Major League Baseball ban the knuckleball? I'm pretty sure Bud Selig would move the pitcher's mound back a few feet before he would come to that. Soooooo... I guess hitters are just going to have to put up with it. The end.

- Sam

Casilla or Tolbert: That's an Easy One

Alexi Casilla has been sent down to AAA. After nearly five weeks of subpar defense, horrible at bats, and a .167 average in 24 games, he is finally off of the major league roster...but for how long? He was not sent down because of his performance. He was sent down because of his complete lack of hustle. He was lazy fielding a ground ball and made a big error (You're welcome Nick Blackburn) and he didn't hustle down to first on a groundout, and carrying his bat the entire way. The Twins system consistently plays average players hoping they will improve, so he will get another chance soon enough to prove himself. I am sick of seeing the Twins stick with a player after giving him multiple chances to prove himself. He only hit .281 last year with a .333 OBP. Those are not good enough numbers to give him a free pass to play. Casilla needs to prove himself fast if he wants to stay in this organization. This is a business and the Twins have no time to waste playing someone who gets one hit every series.

Matt Tolbert may not be the long-term answer for the Twins, but he is a great option, especially if he hits like he did last year (.283 in 41 games). Look for a platoon between Tolbert and Harris to start, hopefully with Tolbert getting the majority of the playing time if he hits well. It's too bad he got hurt last year, then we wouldn't have had such a fiasco at 2B.

For anyone who questions Tolbert's Work Ethic

If there are any ladies out there reading this, you can find out first hand if Tolbert is Available

He was 0-3 in game one, but it was rain-shortened and it's hard to get into a groove when there are 4 hours of a rain delay. He was 7-12 in his last three games at AAA so hopefully he can bring some of that to the Twins clubhouse and give it to Crede and Gomez as well.

-Cheeto

Really Craig Breslow, Really...

You are a major league pitcher but yet you can't throw a strike? Really?

You walk the bases loaded with two walks on 4 - 0 counts? Really?

You make Gardy bring in R.A. Dickey again with the bases loaded? Really?

You make Mauer catch Dickey for the first time...ever? Really?

Did I mention that this is all in the top of the 11th inning? Really?

C'mon man...

- Andy

Mauer Mauer Mauer

What else can you say about this guy? He doesn't play for the Twins for the first month of the season and then in his first at-bat, amid a standing ovation, he hits the ball over the left-centerfield fence. Are you serious?

In his next at bat Joe lined one down the left field line for a double. Since the Royals were so scared of Joey dominating they walked him in his 3rd at bat. If it wasn't for a hit and run gone wrong Joe would have had a 3 for 3 night. With all hits going to the opposite field which isn't a big surprise. Hell even Joe attempted to drag a bunt down the 3rd base line because Mark Tehan was playing and Joe is cool like that.

Also of note: There was a lot of talk about Joe Mauer's new walkup song that was to debut last night...only it didn't. Joe decided to go with the classic (and my favorite walkup song for him) "What you know" by T.I.. I'm glad he went back to this song because he hit .347 while using it and the Twins were awesome. Hopefully it sticks.

-Andy

Chocolate Filled Joe Mauer?

Question of the day: "Does Joe Mauer actually enjoy listening to rap?"

For the past few seasons, Joe Mauer's at-bat theme songs have either been songs by T.I. or St. Paul native, Antonio Richardson. Mauer plans to unveil his new walk-up melody during tonight's game vs KC ("The Joe Mauer Theme Song").

If you have been paying any attention to the Twins the past five years, you are well aware that Mauer is the quintessential All-American white boy. Wouldn't something like "Jack and Diane" by John Mellencamp be a more fitting song for someone of Joe's character? So why would Joey routinely pick rap songs for his at-bat music? Is this his way of passive-aggressively trying to prove to the world that he is more "bad-ass" than we think? Hmmm, something to think about.

Whatever. As long as he hits .347, wins batting titles, silver slugger awards, gold gloves, throws out 43% of potential base stealers, and wears the tools of ignorance for the greatest team in all of baseball, I don't care!

- Sam